My name is Shylo and I am an addict. By the age of 14 years old I had already experienced being molested, and raped. I was using meth, smoking marijuana and drinking. I could go on and on about the things that I had experienced in my 19 years of addiction. What I will say is that it definitely became a way of life. A life, I never thought that I would escape from.
March 7th 2011 There I sat on a cold concrete bench behind bars in my blue county jail uniform. I knew that this was my last visit to county before heading up state to prison. This is what my life of addiction brought me to! At age 33 I had nothing to show for myself except a garage of material stuff that I had collected over the years, that probably didn’t belong to me in the first place! All 3 of my children lived with there fathers. The only thing I cared about was using and finding ways to get more. So there I sat, my life flashing before my eyes. The regrets, the pain, the sadness, the desperation for something different, the hopelessness and shame. Everyone has a rock bottom and this was mine.
I was arrested five times in three months all for possession of a controlled substance. It was like a revolving door until they set my bail at a half of a million dollars. Let me tell you, my God was doing for me what I could not do for myself. During my court hearings I was offered the drug court program and I was interviewed by this beautiful, intimating lady know as Nadine Steele. Although, I believe I had never met her before there was something so familiar about her. I was still afraid that I would fail. I was afraid that I would not be able to stay clean, but more than that I was afraid to go to prison. I prayed to God to guide me and put people in my life to help me do something different. So against everything I believed in I accepted the program. My life changing decision.Lets not forget, that when I accepted the program my only intention was to complete it and go back to my so called life. After all, whats 18 months out of jail in a treatment program compared to 8-18 years of prison?
Although I came into the the program head strong, self-willed, and ready to do anything to beat the system. Through the counseling of Nadine Steele this changed. Let me be honest, the only thing I did absolutely perfect was I never drank or used drugs. I made mistakes, but no matter what I went through she still loved. She taught me how to change my behaviors and get down to the source of the problem through group sessions. She helped me process the tragedies that I had been through that began when I was a child. She reunited me with family that I had distanced myself from in my addiction. She taught me real life skills. How to go out a get employment.and keep it. How to dress like a lady. What healthy relationships consisted of and how to set boundaries. She taught me how to build myself up and believe in my self worth. She has a gift and a passion for helping recovering addicts that is priceless!
January 18, 2013. 6 years ago I graduated from the Drug Court Program and March 7, 2019 I will have 8 years Clean and Sober. I have a life beyond my wildest dreams. I have all of my children in my life plus an extra set of twins, and a grandson. I am a productive member of society and have actually had the same job for 5 years. I have a loving husband that is sharing this journey with me. We are active in our recovery. I have a sponsor who has a sponsor. We are of loving service to our recovery and enjoy putting on all the recovery events for our area. We have goals and dreams that are possible! We have a house over our head that belongs to us. Most of all I have peace of mind and I am no longer haunted by the mistakes of my past. I am grateful for the opportunity to have had such an amazing person as my life coach, counselor, and friend. She believed I could, before I even knew how. Thank you Nadine Steele for giving me a second chance, loving me with patience and kindness. You are forever in my heart!